Wednesday, 16 November 2016

I wish to be with you
Andrea, I want to be with you,
But you are avoiding mine
Is it all my thoughts?
I have done what thy have told me
To sit thy side  near window ,
I sat besides you
For a long long time.
But even then thou told me
Hath lost your interest
Of painting because of only mine.
Even now I'm near the window
Looking far away to have some relief.
By sitting in front of thou
Consider me only as a mere
Object of thy imagination.
You are the only one who,
Closed me in your four walls and your painting
Without giving me a chance
To know whom I was.
Now it's the time
It's the time before us to part.
Andrea,you believe me that I'm thy failure,
Your failure was with mine
So,its the better time for us to part
Forget the past,past is gone
And want to break the four walls,
As the alarm rings  he is waiting for me in the distant lands
I want to go now,
And want to break the four walls, which makes the whole world
And want to roam freely around and around.

                              MY LAST VERSE FOR YOU

 I may turn my face,
but not my heart
Let's together sit by the window,
to blew our memories.
I held your hand
for long as i could, but
I grew weak as you pulled and pulled.
My heart broke when you walked away.
No one could ever understand my Pain.
Right from our marriage,
I find myself lonely.
You rarely has any spare time,
and that too to spent with your goals.
I realized that you have got enough on your plate.
You stays up whole night with colours,
and i realized it is your strength
during very stressful time in life.
I'm tired of crying myself to
sleep alone in every night.
We had issues as every couples does,
but your appearence lacks, intimacy fades.
I've been longing to hold you.

I've been longing to touch you.

Who knows the vows of a beautiful woman?
Once I became a widow.
In the next stage another man entered to my life.
He married me for my beautiful stature.
He compares me with moon
and he took me as a model
for his art work...
But no one understood my soul.
Even though I smile before everyone,
I was shattering inside myself.
I have my own wishes and dreams.
Now I am tied together by the shackles  of chain.
But now I know a person who understands me.
He is everything for me.
You are my world and
I revolve around you.
Oh! my beloved ......
My heart throbbes to see you.
For me, you are the one
Who filled my life with vibrant colours...
Andrea... my husband!!!
He love me and does everything
for my happiness.....
He is the one who spoilt my life.
My parents pressurised me,
to marry Andrea......
a well known painter.
What Andrea wants is a beautiful model.
He loves my outer physique not my soul.
He distroyed my beautiful life.
But now I decided to cheat him with my beautiful  smile...
Thus, I will take revenge on him.
I decided to dedicate my life to my beloved
and live with him to the end of my life.....
          Let me leave.                                 
  Stop saying you love me
  To love me is to respect me
  I thought our love would last forever
That's where i was wrong
To me you truly belonged
Then you left me one day
  I still remember the day
  When you ruined my trust
  The day you left my hand and holded someone else's
You promised me to love me and be faithful
But you lied
My eyes have reopened
To never again let you gain my trust
I was all that you ever wanted me to be
But not anymore
After the repeat of hurt and trust being lost,
Do you deserve a love as pure as mine?
I will not mourn, i will not cry
All I can do is to leave you.

Let Me Live
The warmth of love is still in its youth.
Hold my hand tight, that
I could rest me in you.
Ah! To hear this heartbeat, I live.
You strived for being in my heart,
And after years, you live in  mine.
Mortal was the beauty that,
I and he loved.
Immortal was the love in you.
They loved your art and thus you,
But you starved for mine. Now,
 I could read you without a word.
I won’t let your hands go.
Let me live in the word or your heart.

Let me part
Let me part from you,
I can’t bond with you anymore
I’m not a mere object of yours,
artistic expression.
Andrea often compels me
to stay with him as
I’m the sole inspiration,
now I am no longer in your faultless painting.
Let me live in peace and honor
I ‘m in search of pure love,
that reflects in spiritual and celestial world,
thou love makes me pains and aches,
thou blame me, I am quarreled with you
for the last twelve years.
Now I am fed up with your love, I don’t
Want such a rubbish love.
I felt ashamed of me while
you are forcing me to sit beside the window
for sketching me in thou art,
Andrea, I’m not your serpentine and everybody’s
Moon, but I’m a mere woman who
have honor and respectful life.
Damn it, those who suppress woman.
Now my eyes are filled with tears,
it will shed now, the thirst for the
love of my cousin, who waited
for me till this midnight.
Now it’s time to part with Andrea,
It’s too much now, I gazed at the
starry skies, but they seems no shining
it fades away my hope.
I completely desolate in that night,
I alone in the balcony, my eyes still
wandering here and there, Andréa
calling me to stay with him.
No longer with Andrea, who still
stoling my heart, but it’s unworthy.
I completely refuse his love, I can’t
give my soul to Andrea.
That my soul already filled
in my cousin’s heart and blood.
And now I am waiting for cousin’s whistle,
Whose thoughts, affection and kisses are valuable.
Oh dear cousin… I’m coming now
Take me and hold me
I’ll be with you always
Let blossoms in heaven too.
                                                                                                                 SHAMNA M

         GOT MY SOUL
    I am not your model,
    I am not quarrelling.
    But you ratified as quarrelling voice
    Who told you?I quarrelled.
    It's my pain, I shows you.
    Don't you see my tears?
    My tears,see it,
    it flows like a river from mountain.
    Whenever I loved you,
    you say about your paintings,
    you fly away from me,
     when I have pain,
     pain in my heart,
    you want me to fit a premeditated smile.
    How can I smile?
   You see me,an object for your needs.
    Now,you tell me to sit near window,
    I did it for a long time,
    and still doing.
    You want me to fit a smile,
     I tried it,only for you,
     and for your love
     Andrea, you can see a pure soul?
     In me?
     No, you can't.
     You need my youth for your pleasure.
    Once, I was your eyes,
    you were blind that time.
    Time changes everything.
    Now, dare to say?
    I am your eyes...No,
    love for you means your paintings.
    You need me as your Madonna?
    Apologize,I cannot,I am real.
    You need me to see yourself,
     I tried, but I failed to see,
     your creations, your pleasure,
     yours,yours and yours.
     I was alone all these years.
     Life with you taught me Death.
     Death calls me more,
     but he may leads me to hell.
    Now ,you need me for a company,
    you says it's to heaven, but to hell.
    No more talking,
    Your voice, feels me wild.
    Stop it for your sake,
    No more time to waste.
    He is waiting for me,
    for filling my soul with love.
    Here, I am going...
1st MA English